K-Pop Convention 4

It has been long hiatus for this blog. I was not really busy, focusing in school, but it really took a lot of my time. I had a lot of time wasted in school, though. Yeah, until now might still be our break for Christmas and New Year, but the worst one ever. I believe we only have less than two weeks since our last day 'til January 3rd. Sick, right? Well, perhaps I had the best Christmas celebration with my family, though I worry much about my paper works to be done before the start of classes. Hayst.

Yesterday, I went to K-Pop Con 4 without any plans in stock. It was just an urgent hangout with my old friends. I really believe that sometimes planning would not bring what is desired to happen. Actually, I just left home without even worrying of what to buy and the money in my wallet. So it happens that I still have a little money to eat and buy some cheap stuff and for transportation. 

SHAMELESS

I have been harsh to myself lately. Supposedly, I am trying to be a better student, but turned out to be worst. Just yesterday, I was destined to recite the PGC's preamble. So I did, but it should had been presented with something else, like a talent or whatsoever. I was actually planning to sing or rather rap it, however twisted everything. I stood on that flat form, consumed a lot of time, thinking of what possible talent I can manage with my recitation. Seriously, I don't want to continue anymore, it was terrible; I was in midst of nervous breakdown. My professor got disappointed by the time I even mentioned failing that certain activity, but yeah, I finished just plainly reciting the preamble alone.

My yesterday was a bad day. I was being rude to my professors, especially with my English one. I don't want it that way, treating her like she is not even inside the room. I was starting and joining commotions with my classmates, which disrupts her talking. I feel really ashamed, and I should be. I pity her, but pity myself more. I just feel so terrible about yesterday.

Now thinking these, lessons me with how badly I did for the past few days. I meant it, I know. I really intend to be mean and lazy with all the stuff and people whom I feel like acting that way. I always tell other people differently the way I respect myself and others. It is really bothering me right now. I feel like isolating myself from them, to at least renew mine. I don't wanna say more things, just act to my responsibilities and oblige myself to accept whatever God gives me.


Goodnight x